


Can you keep a secret again

by mechanicsofabrokenheart1



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-26
Updated: 2014-10-26
Packaged: 2018-02-22 17:38:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2516201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mechanicsofabrokenheart1/pseuds/mechanicsofabrokenheart1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>http://swanqueengranger.tumblr.com/post/49744145295/my-new-headcanon-about-regina-emma-and-snow<br/>swanqueengranger . tumblr post/49744145295/my-new-headcanon-about-regina-e m m a-and-snow<br/>Just add '.com' after 'Tumblr' coz appearantly FF is a being intolerant towards links.<br/>I have no idea if someone has written a piece based on that head canon, but I did. I apologize if someone has already done it. I'm huge fan of that head canon.<br/>Set on Hook's ship just after Henry's rescue. The way the kid is saved may or may not happen on the show, but it happens here because it serves the plot.<br/>Enjoy</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can you keep a secret again

Snow White is a woman capable of many things. She can ride a horse and car. She can fire a bow and she never misses her target. She can cook a huge variety of dishes. She can operate a computer. She can teach children. She can also see  _it_.

And right now, she sees  _it_. Standing at the deck of Hook's ship, her eyes go back and forth between her daughter, Emma, and her former step-mother, Regina.

Emma is talking to Gold about Bae and how much she has loved him, and probably still does. She is not sure of it, but she knows that she said it to him before he disappeared into the big green hole.

Then, Snow's eyes land on Regina's face. The former Queen is leaning on one of the pillars next to them. She hears everything and tries very hard to maintain her regal pose and hold down the fire burning in her chest.

But Snow sees  _it_ : the teeth biting the upper lip, the slight quiver in the bottom lip, the eye roll that is meant to keep the hurt hidden. But the water in her brown orbs is something she can't hide, no matter how much she tries.

"No matter what he has done to me, he is Henry's father..." Emma says, but Regina's cough stops her. She looks at the other woman, seeing that her chest is flushed and she is hitting her chest.

The blonde stands up and walks over to the former Queen.

"You okay?" She asks with sincere worry in her eyes, hesitatingly raising a hand to pat the woman's back.

"Don't touch me," Regina yells, startling everyone and takes a step back. Flushed with embarrassment from her outburst, she runs to her cabin.

Emma follows her, wanting to know what had caused such an outburst. Her mother's arm stops her.

"Don't. I'll talk to her." Snow says.

"Okay." Emma agrees, though she doesn't really have an option.

Snow walks over to the cabin thinking about what she had just seen. She did see how Regina gets irritated whenever Emma mentions Bae. And it's not the fact that he is Henry's father. She is content, sort of, with that fact. But the way she looks at Emma, and the way her face lit up; the way she smiles every time Emma smiles. Snow has already seen  _it_...in another land and, right now, it feels like in another lifetime, when another love was blooming. The hurt in her eyes when Emma said that she still loves Bae was close to what Snow saw at Daniel's grave when Regina offered her the apple.

She stops just before the door and takes a deep breath. "Regina, may I come in?"

For a few seconds, she waits in silence.

"Come in."

And she feels like she is fifteen again and entering Regina's bedchambers.

As she opens the door, her heart speeds up though she is taking deep breaths.

Regina is standing up and looking through her small window at the sea. Her back is the door.

"Regina, what happened?" Snow asks, though she knows the answer. The woman in front of her just couldn't continue listening to Emma praising Bae.

"I think that... It's not about Bae being Henry's father. I think there is something else." The short haired woman looks at the older woman, whose posture is regal as ever; the perfect mask.

"Emma... S-She has trouble expressing how she feels, and what comes out of her mouth... often is not true. She often regrets a lot of the things she has said."

Of course she would defend her child, Regina thinks. She is a mother too and understands it.

"I may have been under a curse for twenty eight years, repeating the same day, but I'm  _not_  stupid. I see  _it_  in your eyes. I have seen  _it_  since..." Snow sighs and looks away from the woman in front of her. She continues, "you and Emma helped stop the failsafe from exploding."

And that is when Regina breaks. The tears are streaming down her cheeks freely, and her whole body shakes. She had tried to keep everything under the radar. She has kept the lingering gazes at a minimum. She had kept her usual hostile attitude towards Emma. But someone managed to see  _it_ ; Snow of all people. Oh, God; the irony of life.

Taking a deep breath, she turns around, facing her once step daughter. She opens her mouth to say something. She wants to say something smart, but the fire in her answer is extinguished. She can't fire at Snow, and that pains her deeply.

She looks at the floor and asks, "Do you know...what it is like...to lose someone that you love dearly?"

Green eyes meet the brown.

"Yes." Snow replies, wondering where this is headed.

"Me too," Regina chuckles. She raises her eyebrows. "Three times. And you don't get used to the pain." She shakes her head, her voice dripping with pain; pain of losing the ones she has loved.

"Who says you will lose her?"

"She does."

Snow's eyes widen.

"Didn't you hear her? She is still in love with Rumple's brat."

"Believe me, Regina, she is  _not_. She thinks she is but she is not." Snow shakes her head.

But it doesn't matter, Regina thinks. Emma will never love  _her_. No one will love her for that matter. She is doomed not to be loved ever again, despite what Daniel has told her.

"You have to tell her." Snow's suggestion snaps Regina out of her thoughts.

"No." The firm Queen's voice echoes in the little cabin.

 _I figured_ , Snow sighs.  _Regina is afraid to lose again_.

"So what will you do?'

"Nothing." Regina says like it's the easiest thing in the world.

"Yes; I can see that working out just fine. Regina, it wouldn't take too long for her to notice."

"She won't because..." Regina mentally kicks herself for giving her intentions away.

"What are you planning?"

"Once Henry is safe, I will travel to the Enchanted Forest, or what's left of it, and live there till my last days. You will  _all_ return to Storybrooke with Henry."

"Regina, do you really believe that Henry and Emma will let you do it?"

"And who they are to  _let_  me, hmm?" Regina asks slowly with a deeply throaty voice, advancing on Snow with every word. "I'm Queen, and I will do as I please."

Yes, the Queen in her will never die. It's part of her, after all. But Snow knows that Emma and Henry could help Regina control her.

"They are the people you love the most in this, and every other, world. And I know you would do anything for the people you love. Because when you love, you love deeply and you give yourself completely. You give all for their sake, and you being away from them, is not for their sake."

"That's a low blow, Snow. But then again, it's what you do best."

"It's not a blow, Regina. I'm merely..."

"Do you know what you will do, Snow?" Regina cuts her off, their faces now inches apart.

Snow doesn't fear the closeness. She even dares Regina to proceed.

"You will exit  _my_  cabin, get back on that deck to  _your_  precious family, and never speak of  _this_  again."

If it wasn't for the command hidden in the husky voice, Snow would have gotten the feeling that history repeats herself.

She turns around and leaves the cabin as ordered. The Queen watches her retreating form with hope flashing in her eyes.

History does repeat herself, Snow thinks. Regina once again fails to hide her feelings before her. Regina once again pleads Snow to keep it a secret. Well, she didn't plead, but still. This time the outcome will be different, because Snow plans on following the command. She will not tell.

Right now, Snow White finds that keeping her silent promise is hard.

Up until now, it was easy, but not now. Now, she thought she was back on the couch, sitting next to Cora, with the other woman pulling the information out of her with her sick smile and pretend care for her daughter. Thank God Cora was dead. It could have been so much worse now.

"You are not allowed to use magic around Henry. He could have been hurt."

Or not.

"Who you think you are to forbid  _me_  from using magic?"

Emma is yelling and Regina yells back, again, for the second time after they landed in Neverland.

The first time, the dispute was over the fact that Regina knew exactly where the Lost Boys' camp was, while Emma, not quite used to her magic, declared that her mother-son bond was telling her to go in the other direction. Snow and David looked at them, terrified, while Hook and Gold watched, amused.

Now, the problem was that Regina attacked Peter Pan with her magic, with a controlled blast, which was supposed to weaken the creature enough to let go of Henry. It  _did_. The dark shadow high above in the sky dropped Henry and the boy started falling like a sack of potatoes. Completely naturally, Emma was petrified and cursed herself for not knowing spells so she can grab Henry. Gold came to the rescue, capturing the boy in time and lowering him to the safety of his blonde's mother embrace. The creature was a little shaken by Regina's powerful magic, which gave them enough time to run for the Jolly Roger.

Gold is down at the cabins with Henry, having their grandfather-grandson bonding moment. Hook is holding the steering wheel of the ship, but he keeps an eye on the action behind him. David is standing next to his wife.

"I am the mother of  _our_  child. That's who I am," Emma shouts, staring right at brown eyes before.

Regina freezes.

Snow does too.

Everyone else does too.

 _Our_... That little flame of hope that had always lived in Regina grows bigger at the sound of that word.  _Our_. Yours and mine. Not just mine or just yours.  _Our_. It is everything for her right now, and so close, yet she knows it will pass as the minutes roll on.

Silence and then...

"You are in no position to forbid me anything," Regina hisses, sounding every bit of the Evil Queen she once was and still is.

The sweet moment she wants to hold forever is gone; it passes. So, she might as well keep her dignity.

"I am if that is going to harm him in any way." Emma insists, not feeling intimidated by the woman before her.

"Oh for the love of Gods," Snow yells, throwing her head backwards, hands in front of her, palms spread like she wants to strangle someone. She has had enough of this bullshit. She looks at her daughter. "Emma, Regina did nothing wrong with her magic. She gained us time to escape with Henry. No one was hurt... except Peter Pan."

"You are on her side?" Emma's eyebrows shot up to her hairline.

"No. I'm not. I'm on the side of you not yelling at her."

"What she did..."

"She meant no harm." Snow interrupts whatever she is going to say.

Regina just sighs at the interaction, curious to see who is going to get hurt.

"But she..."

"Henry is fine." Snow is getting more enraged by the second at her daughter's blindness and ignorance. How could she possibly be so blind?

"I know that..."

"I'm fine." A hand is raised at Emma's face.

"Yeah, but..."

"Everyone else is fine." Snow motions to the people on the deck, but realized that there are only David and Hook.

The pirate decides it's getting rather interesting and turns fully to the group.

"That's beside the point."

Snow rolls her eyes. Sometimes, that family stubbornness is way too much.

"That is precisely the point, Emma. She did what was right. She helped us."

Emma blinks rapidly, not understanding her at all.

Seeing the confusion, Snow continues. "She took the  _hard_  path. She stood up in front of everyone, building a wall between us and that creature. She shook it enough so Henry could get free and be here with us."

"But he could have..." Emma's voice dies at the back of her throat. She tries and tries to stay angry at Regina for as long as she could, but all reasons are crashing down like cards blown by the wind.

"She could have too," Snow whispers and stands in front of Emma.

Regina pulls away just a little bit before commenting with a small voice, "That is not in her interests."

The glare the Emma gives to Regina is deadly, and yet hurt peeks through.

Suddenly, Emma is lunging at Regina. The Queen stands still, not scared. Well, maybe she is. A little. Just a little.

The space between the two women is no more than two steps, but it looks like punches will be thrown.

At least, that's what it looks like in Snow's eyes.

Emma stops just a breath away from Regina. She knows that this is the closest she has been to the woman since the mine incident. She did miss it; being this close, breathing the same air, breathing in sync.

"You will not tell me what is in my interest or not. You don't know what is going on in my head." Her voice is commanding, demanding, leaving no way out.

Regina gazes at the green eyes in amusement. Her trademark one-sided evil smirk is appearing on her face.

But Emma notices the fire in the eyes. She notices that the smirk is now more of a teasing one, one that shows admiration, even. Admiration? From Regina? No. She must be dreaming.

"Same goes for you." The Queen says calmly, shocking everyone.

She is not fighting? She is stepping away from a fight?

Snow suspects that this might have something to do with their conversation earlier.

"Can you just stop?" she yells at the two women.

David raises his eyebrows in astonishment, while Hook raises one, intrigued as to where this is going.

Both Emma and Regina spin their heads towards her.

"You two... You take two steps forward and then three backwards. You are at the same position in your relationship as you where before the curse broke."

"What relationship?" Regina challenges her, though she suspects Snow will do it again.

"You two are bonded for life by Henry, like it or not. You are in a relationship with each other because you are raising Henry together."

"I made not such agreement." Regina shakes her head.

"Yeah...what she said." Emma confirms.

"You stop," Snow yells and points a finger at her daughter, who scrunches her eyebrows together. "Stop doing that to her."

Regina opens her mouth in shock and Emma blinks rapidly.

"Stop pulling her in and then pushing her out. It's confusing." Snow continues, with her voice strong. She is done. She is telling  _it_   _all_. She is not a secret keeper, and the  _fuck_  with everything. She is going to be who she is.

Regina clenches her fists, ready to throw her overboard.

"You can't run around and play with other people's emotions just because you don't know what you are feeling."

Snow exhales deeply. There it is. It's all out. She let it all out, and she feels relief again. Only this time, she knows she is telling the secret. She knows what she is doing. She just can't take it anymore. She can't watch as these two women waste time and hurt each other just because they are fools.

"What are you talking about?" David moves closer to his wife.

"They know what I am talking about."

"You can't keep your mouth shut. Can you?" Regina barks at her.

"Don't talk to my wife like that," David threatens, but no one seems to pay him any attention.

Hook is enjoying the show.

"Not in this case. No." Snow answers.

"Mother, what are you talking about?"

"You know very well. Or do you need me to hit you,  _both_ , over the head with it?" Snow shoots the words at her daughter.

"It can't be." Emma shakes her head and walks backward.

Already figuring out what Snow is talking about, Regina advances on Emma.

"Why are you so sure it can't be? What's so wrong about it?"

"Regina..." Emma looks away from those damn piercing brown eyes.

"Okay. Look at me in the eyes and tell me she is wrong." Regina demands the truth.

Her magic has just been awoken like a sleeping dragon from its deep slumber. Yes, she did use magic to save Henry, but this... feels different. It feels new, and even more addicting. Her magic is what gives her the strength to step forward, to go for it, to request the truth.

Because, frankly, she is tired; tired of restraining herself. These feelings she keeps in her heart are far too overwhelming for her poor unfortunate soul to handle.

And Emma  _can't_. Of course she can't. She might be new to this magic thing, but what she knows is that it's  _not_  accidental when her magic starts running faster in her body when Regina is near. It is  _something_  when she can control her magic better when her instructions come from the former Queen, not Rumpelstiltskin. It is definitely  _something_ , when late at night, she dreams of cuddling Regina. Cuddling, for fuck's sake. She has never, ever, dreamed of this before. Regina is the first person she dreams of cuddling with; not fucking, not making love with, just lying naked on the bed, with bodies press firmly against each other and breathing in sync.

For the first time in her life, Snow feels that telling the secret she was told to protect is a good thing. It is the right thing to do. It is the hard path. And she is taking it. Because  _it_  can't be hidden.  _It_  has to be lived.


End file.
